Dear Simon,

I've dreamed about meeting you since the moment I learned of your existence.  And as the date draws near, I'm counting down the days until I can hold you in my arms. But for the time being, if you don’t mind, could you try to take it easy on your mother?

If you're anything like me, and your mother says you are, I’m sure you’re getting a tad bit restless as you hear all of the commotion going on the outside.  Not to mention how claustrophobic it must be getting in there.  But Mom is having quite the time with you and the number you've done on her feet, back, wrists, and pretty much everything else.  She misses her body and wants it back (I of course love her body just the way it is).

I know it’s not your fault, trust me, your mother has made it quite clear where the blame lies.  I’m glad you’re growing and active as you prepare to make your grand entrance, but maybe you could ease up on her bladder just a bit.  She’s not getting much sleep these nights, and when she does it can be a bit terrifying.  She snores and moans, sometimes speaking in tongues that frighten your father.  But this isn't about me, I usually just head down to the other room and fall into a deep, uninterrupted sleep until morning, often times receiving a cold stare from your very tired mother as I wake up refreshed and chipper.

Anyways, she’s lugged you around for so long now, and both you and her have done so well.  Soon enough, it will be my turn to share the load.  We’ll have to work together when you get home, maybe we can figure out some sort of schedule.  I'll make you a deal, if you take it easy on us, I will see to it you never have to wear some of the more hideous clothes your mother wants to dress you in.  Yeah, they're that bad...

But I’m jumping ahead; what I really wanted to address is this whole labor thing.  Let's play a game, the goal is to make this process as smooth as possible.  For your mother’s sake let's try to set some sort of smooth birthing record.  I'm sure you must have some concerns about the whole thing yourself--which you will no doubt voice once you're out--but I think if the two of you remain calm during the delivery, we will all be fine.   After all, Dad will be doing enough freaking out for everybody.

So enjoy the warm and cozy confines of the womb for the next few weeks.  I’ll enjoy these last few weeks of sleep and try to deal with your mother as the nesting stage has arrived.  I’m looking forward to our face to face in the near future, and just remember, remain calm and head for the light.  Safe travels and I’ll see you soon.

Love,

Dad