Dad's Not Too Bright...

Being that I’m the glue that holds together our small family, I was home with Simon yesterday while Mom spent the day at the pool.  The weather was clear and pleasant, so as we hung outside on the carport, Simon swiveled and bounced in his saucer.  That’s when I noticed, after mowing the lawn that morning—back to that glue thing— that pesky tree branch sitting on the power line.  It had been bothering me for a while, so  with Simon content, I snatched my handsaw and added yet another chore to my epic list of Saturday chores.

The branch was about as thick as my arm, in other words, it didn’t take long for me to saw right through it.  But like most of my brilliant ideas, there was a slight hitch.  The limb it came down directly on the power line, you know, the whole reason I was up in the tree with a handsaw cutting it down. Crap. I peeked over at Simon, and noticed a not too subtle smirk on his little face.  Yeah Yeah, I know. Mom said that would happen.  I assessed the situation, much like a caveman would consider a fork, and then decided I needed the ladder.

Having already watched his dad scale the tree with a saw to hack away near a live power line, my son now looked on as his father returned to the power line on an aluminum ladder.  As I reached out for the branch, thoughts flashed through my head, of my son at school, bragging about how his father was the recipient of a Darwin Award.  I wrangled the branch off of the line and tossed it to the ground.  Problem solved.  I glanced over at my smiling son cheering me on, and then hopped off the ladder and dusted myself off.  Picking him up from his saucer, father and son admired our handiwork and he squealed his approval. And then it was time for some fatherly advice. Don’t tell mom…