I’m having a major dilemma in my marriage. My wife refuses to use a top sheet in bed. Every few days morning when I make the bed, I
meticulously tuck the sheet under the comforter and other modern amenities
afforded to civilized human beings. Despite
these efforts, I wake up in the middle of the night to a twisted knot wrapped around my ankles.
Somehow this slid under my radar in the early days of our
marriage. I don’t remember her being
such a slouch in bed….wait! That’s not what I meant...I mean, maybe this was a post pregnancy
thing, her sheet-less ways. Maybe it
came with the I’m hot, no I’m cold stage
and just never left.
So what gives? Will
we end up with two single beds separated by a nightstand littered with large print editions of Reader’s
Digests and AARP mailers? Her pen scattered
with hay bales and tattered afghans, some pales of water nearby.
There’s always bunk beds…but I hope it doesn’t come to that, at least not
for a few more years. Still, something has to give. Well not really, who am I kidding here? We all know that she’ll get her way in the
end and I’ll have to stoop to such primitive sleeping habits.